I'm pretty sure I'm past the appropriate age to be up at this hour...

3 hours ago, I was exhausted. The instant I got in bed my brain said? "No. You had like 15 Pepsi Max's today. This is what you get." Suddenly I was very concerned with all the worlds problems, and can not sleep because my brain believes that stressing out over things that I generally have no control over and losing sleep is a good thing.

So I have been lying here awake for the last three hours and silently freaking out to myself as my fiance slumbers LOUDLY, but peacefully next to me. The following is a list of things that have come to me out of nowhere to terrorize me in the night:

"What was that? Is that rustling outside?"

"Snow? But why? How much? That can't be right..they're never right...but whyyy?" I'd like to note that I was aware of the snow prior to my failed attempt to sleep, but did not care at the time. My brain suddenly decided it should panic.

"Why is he snoring so much? Does he do that all the time? What if he has sleep apnea? What is that again? Can't he die from that? Maybe I should wake him up." My next thought was to plug his nose and wake him that way but since I think sleep apnea makes him stop breathing in his sleep I would probably just be helping it. So instead, I hit him.

"Okay I'm pretty sure that was rustling."

"I need to go clean the kitchen! I left clay magnets out and the cat is going to throw them around and eat them!" (my cat eating clay is a logical worry, fyi.) "I just need to make a space for my crafting stuff" this thought quickly turned into "Dear god I'm turning into my grandma. She had a whole room just for beads. BEADS. Is this my future?"

"Spider!! Was that a spider?! That felt like a spider!"

"Maybe I should make some tea." The next 30 minutes consisted of me debating on wether or not to go make tea, then if I were to make tea what kind of tea would I want. Also that I don't have a nice tea cup and I should probably make one and then another 10 minutes thinking about what designs I would put on the cup if I were to make one. Which I decided upon as a bag of tea....in retrospect probably not the most original idea.

"Why was Captain Picard so angry in that episode of Star Trek tonight? It's like he wanted nothing at all to do with the Enterprise. He just wanted to go horse back riding and drink Earl Grey. What the fuck is up with that? I need to demand a back story to that episode."

"Dammit what the hell is that? Is it a squirrel or something? What kind of weirdo squirrel would be up at this hour in the snow hanging out outside of my bedroom window? Probably a murderous one..."

Then approximately 13 minutes thinking about Wil Wheaton.

Then a genuine feeling of distress over having to wake up and put on real human clothes in the morning.

"Maybe I should wake Garrett up to make tea. He probably wants some. It'll help with his not breathing."

Then after quite a few smacks to make Garrett stop snoring and or wake up to make tea "You should stop hitting him. He bruises easily and people already think you beat him when you go out in public together." To which I'd like to add, I do not....except for tonight. He's asleep though. It's not really beating someone unless they're awake.

And this is all accompanied by several thoughts of I am going to be so incredibly tired tomorrow. Which is true. As I am now getting a migraine. Still hearing rustling.

Also if anyone with an iPhone can tell me how to turn off the incredibly obnoxious British woman that loudly and RUDELY corrects spelling and grammar errors it would be greatly appreciated. I feel like I have an bitchy judgemental British woman in my pocket yelling out all my faults. Also it's really not effective for texting in public when she's loudly shouting out things I type for the world to hear.

Thank you